Gratitude*Sunday

Importing a tradition, slowly, from Wooly Moss Roots. It's good to stop and remember to be thankful...even if the children are screaming while I write this note...

Recently I have been Grateful for...

*Listening to Sister-Bug sing along to 'Leaving on a Jet Plane' while Papa-Bug and Granddad played it on guitars together.

Spelling is magic.

*Watching Brother-Bug tackle the wonderful world of spelling through Bananagrams and Scrabble.

*A dear and wonderful friend who happened to be awake in the middle of a hard night, just when I needed her.

*The appearance of two new adult teeth in Brother-Bug's smile - and the related shudder that comes from kids growing up too fast.

Fresh eggs inspire such ideas of quiche...as soon as we have enough...

*Papa-Bug's sick leave policy, so that I can have a little extra help when I really need it.

*Our chickens finally gifting us with wonderful eggs!

*Family that comes for wonderful visits.

*The peace that descends on our house when it's just the 4.6 of us.

*Watching my belly roll and shift as the baby dances. It really makes me wonder who this being will be???

*The quality of the light in August early in the morning. Something about it is especially golden. 


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What are you grateful for?

Those Other Mothers

Look at the time - it's early in the morning or late at night... Sister-Bug has been up all night with a nasty tummy something. The poor little thing wakes up in agony every few minutes to shriek and writhe.

(I have thoroughly checked her and ruled out the need for immediate medical care... I'm guessing a very bad gas bubble.)

It was a long day today, visiting my sister in California and adventuring around her haunts. We aren't in our own bed, which makes this harder. And every few minutes I must be ON. On for crooning and tummy rubs and sitting up rocking, or anything else that eases this baby's discomfort.

And I do it.

It's very zen. We are here and now doing this because there is nothing else to be done.

It is nights like this that I feel the Other Mothers. These are the mothers that span time and place. Mothers of ancient Sumeria or present day Finland. Pioneer mothers or exiled queens. My ancestors, and any other mother who has sat up with a sick child, all night long, dredging compassion and patience and one more lullaby from the depth of her weary being.

I feel their hands on my back when I want to lay down, but must remain sitting. I feel their hands gently over my mouth when I want to scream with tired frustration. I feel their love pouring over me, enabling me to continue pouring love over my child.

I am so grateful for those other mothers - the ones who have sat up in the past and the ones who are sitting up tonight. And I hope, someday, my spirit can fly to a future mother as she sits rocking all night long.

Light a Candle, Say a Prayer

Today my guts are in a knot.

I got word that a dear child of my community was hit by a van and is in the ICU. Predictions are that her injuries are not life-threatening, thank all the Gods that might be listening.

This makes me doubly sure that I hug and squeeze my own sweet babies lots.

It makes me reflect on The Big Subjects.

I never imagined, when I delightedly anticipated the arrival of my son, how fraught with terror parenting actually is. Loss, sickness, accident, and catastrophe loom behind every shadow. Mostly I wend my way through our days without too much worry, but it's always there in the far back corners of my mind.

What if...

Sometimes they are just the silliest what ifs. Sometimes they are more realistic. Sometimes I see the narrow miss and my heart nearly stops. Sometimes I have to check and double check the rise and fall of that small, precious chest. Sometimes I can't sleep for dreadful dreams and imaginings.

If you are a parent you know what I am talking about.

My heart is with the parents, dear friends, in the ICU. I am praying that I am never there with any of my babies.

When I can't sleep I say grace and give thanks. Because whatever happens tomorrow, my kids and I have had today. Whatever happens in the morning, we are cuddling NOW. I hope that I can remember these moments of thankfulness when Grace might seem far away. I hope that I can remember that nothing and no one can take away my moments and memories and all the wonderful times I have already experienced as a parent.

So we pray...

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Take a moment now, before you navigate away, and say a prayer - send a wish - think a good thought - send some Grace to the parents who need it. Then go hug or kiss or text someone you are grateful for. You are so lucky.