Why No Ultrasounds?

I have never had an ultrasound during a pregnancy. Happily, my babes have so far grown perfectly without any need to check and make sure that they are okay. I have nothing against someone else having an ultrasound for whatever reasons they deem fit, but they just aren't for me.

I would have an ultrasound if the health and well-being of me or the baby were in question and I wouldn't hesitate. I am fully in support of using the magic of technology and modern medicine to prevent problems and save lives. In this writing I am considering only the routine ultrasounds done throughout a pregnancy.

There are a number of questions surrounding routine ultrasound, and you can read about them in Mothering's article here, if you are interested. I'm writing about why I don't ultrasound my pregnancies.

My superficial hesitation - those ultrasound images are kind of creepy and alien. The images of the standard ultrasound are odd enough, but the newer 3-D images look to me like someone has tried to sculpt Winston Churchill out of pudding and failed...I don't really want that to be a "first" visual of my baby.

Sister-Bug has a cuddle, hoping to be kicked in the head. 

I've been surprised at every pregnancy the amount of judgement extended to a family who chooses not to find out the baby's gender. You, random stranger in the grocery store, need to know the gender of my baby for what reason? We should know the gender so we...know what to buy? Additional judgement is extended when it's revealed that we don't have any ultrasounds, with or without gender. It's as though I am intentionally endangering my baby because of sheer pig-headedness, as though I'm a bad parent for not counting the baby's fingers and toes before it joins my reality.
I marvel as my belly grows each time. I wonder if it's a boy or girl...but even more I wonder what idiosyncrasies, what personality quirks and traits have manifested as this baby grows inside me. I wonder if it will have a secret dimple like it's sister, or the funny ribs that Brother-Bug inherited from me. These things won't be revealed by an ultrasound, and I wouldn't want them to be.

We do use an ultrasound doppler with our midwife to hear the baby's heartbeat, and without fail all three babies have, as soon as they were big enough, moved away from it's waves, deeper into my cavities. They don't like it (how I can tell they don't like it is a topic for another post). The doppler is a very low-level wave, much lower than the wave needed to see the outlines of a baby. If my babies don't like this little wave, if we can tell that they are distressed by it, how much more might they be distressed by the larger sonics of a visual ultrasound?

But ultimately what it comes down to is this: My body has made this dark and protected cave in which my baby takes its first movements, begins its heartbeats, and turns to the gentle stimuli that come through the layers of my skin and muscle. It is the quintessence of private and intimate. The idea of ultrasound penetrating this privacy just doesn't work for me; it violates something sacred.

There are lots of people in the world for whom ultrasound is an important part of their journey through pregnancy, and I applaud their decision and ability to choose what is right for their body and baby. But it's not a route I plan on taking - for a third time around.

A Little Pregnancy Post

I'm 17-ish weeks pregnant with my little new one. Things are going well, growing as they should, and evolving nicely. Baby-Bug can hear a little, and seems to be something of a kick-boxer. We have had two prenatals with our midwife - the same midwife who was present for the delivery of the Little-Bugs - and have heard a strong heartbeat both times. It's nice to know that Baby has a circulatory system!

I thought an peek into my style of pregnancy might be fun...

*We do no internal investigations. No ultrasounds, no tests, nothing that invades the baby's special space. We would do these things if the midwife or my intuition suggested that it might be important for my and the baby's safety. But as things are progressing normally, we see no reason to fuss this very busy little individual. Baby knows what it's doing and we're trusting the process.


*We are planning to have a homebirth. I will write a longer post about chosing homebirth sometime in the near future, as well as sharing Brother & Sister-Bug's birth stories. We will transport to a hospital if the midwife or my intuition recognizes that as the safest option, but with two wonderful and successful homebirths behind me, I am confident in my body's ability to do this thing.


*Brother-Bug and Sister-Bug will attend the birth, with loving support from a couple key members of friends and family to care for them. I deeply believe that the presence of siblings at births makes the birth a normal part of their lives and the expansion of their family. I loved having Brother-Bug present for Sister-Bug's birth, and now I am delighted as he shows his sister the ropes - explaining the prenatal process to her, telling her it might be loud while I'm having contractions, and generally supporting her. He is owning his knowledge and that is awesome.


*I am still nursing Sister-Bug and will continue to nurse her and the new baby. I am, in fact, nursing while I type this post. This is called Tandem Nursing. Brother-Bug nursed till Sister was almost one. It's a wonderful way to teach sharing, and the connections that they had early on (holding hands while nursing) were magical. There will be a longer post about Tandem Nursing coming soon.

Those are the essential points. Some of them are considered controversial by some people. I'm not writing this to cast judgements on those who make different choices than me, and I hope you keep any judgements you make to yourself. These are choices that work for our family.

And now that the interminable morning-noon-and-nighttime sickeness is done, I'm looking forward to growing bigger and loving the many adventures that each pregnancy brings with it.

And...We're Back!

I didn't really mean to take that break during the past month. But that's the way it went and I'm here to tell you that there will probably be other random breaks coming up in the next year.

We are expecting a Baby-Bug will join our family sometime around Thanksgiving.

For the past month I have been nauseated during all waking hours, as well as completely drained of all my energy. As I know from my other two pregnancies, the first trimester is really hard on me. It's been enough to keep up with my Little-Bugs and do a dish or two...let alone find any mental reserves for writing,

However, there are a number of pregnancy related posts floating around in my head, and hopefully a few of them will make it onto this blog.

And of course, eventually, baby pictures!