Remembering the Now

Mama and kids piled up, as seen by my phone.

I am more of a morning person than anything else. The occasional day I like to sleep in, lounge, and cuddle until later hours, but usually I am easily restless, curious to see what the day will bring. With a nursling in bed, this can sometimes be a challenge.

Sister-Bug loves to snack and snuggle from about 5:30 on. Sometimes she gets up at 7 or so, sometimes not til 8 or later. Somedays she is deep enough that I can get up and grab a few moments with Papa-Bug, or to myself. Most mornings we cuddle and nurse.

Some mornings Brother-Bug cuddles up to me, effectively pinning me between two sleeping kidlets. Then I am truly stuck, even if Sister-Bug is deep enough for me to detach and persue my own aims. 

Some days I lay there fuming, impatient to get going.

This is a waste of time and energy, as well as precious moments.

In what will feel like minutes, these precious children of mine will leave the family bed and I will be able to get in and out as my whimsy dictates. In the blink of an eye I will kiss them as they leave for sleep-overs, travels, college... Papa-Bug and I will have our bed back to ourselves again.

As Gretchen Rubin so aptly states: "The days are long, but the years are short." I lose so much if I wish away these long morning cuddles. 

Right now, in these moments, my kids want only that I cuddle them. They still fit snug next to me. They aren't so big yet. These are not moments to wish away, so that I might do dishes, or check email, or other mundane dailies. These are precious moments to savor, each and every one.

To get some extra rest.

To dream or daydream.

To read a little while they snooze.

To enjoy the curves and lines of these two beautiful little people, and to marvel at how fast they are growing.

These are the moments I will miss someday.